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Friday, July 18, 2008

Fox Sports vs. ESPN....Who Ya Got?

2004… seems like it was only yesterday……gas was $2 a gallon, the Cubs looked like they would make the playoffs, Lance Armstrong was still giving his annual middle-finger to France, and Husker fans were hopeful a Super Bowl-caliber coach would bring National Titles back to Lincoln. I don’t have to remind you how that Husker season turned out, but that year ESPN gave us a reason to hope. We were all looking for silver linings after that 70-10 embarrassment in Lubbock and found it on the weekly ESPN Thursday night broadcast, where we were introduced to a new sideline reporter. I’m talking about the one and only Erin Andrews. How could any network compete with ESPN after bringing out this ratings killer? Well, don’t think FOX’s Rupert Murdoch was just going to take this lying down. We are talking about the same guy who married a 30-year old Asian chick when he was 68. He instructed his FOX Sports HR department to find the hottest reporters possible, regardless of broadcasting talent. He once said something like this, “I don’t care if you have to offer a job to a former Playmate, just bring me something that can make me forgot the name Erin Andrews, at least for 3 minutes.” Is that possible? No. But in this column, I’m letting you decide the FOX vs. ESPN matchups.

Who Ya Got?

FOX's smoking hot Jillian Barberie

vs. ESPN's latest edition Nicole Manske?

FOX's West Coast bombshell Lindsay Soto

vs. ESPN's recent divorcee and now Schuman-less, Stacey Dales?

FOX's former beach volleyball player Mary Strong

vs. ESPN's abolute Super-Cougar Colleen Dominguez?

FOX's girl-next-door Charissa Thompson

vs. ESPN's NFL expert Bonnie Bernstein?

And last, but not least, FOX's former Playmate Lisa Dergan

vs. ESPN's one and only Erin Andrews?

These are some tough matchups. Lisa vs. Erin is right up there with the greatest match-ups in sports history. We’re talking Ali vs. Frazier, Federer vs. Nadal, and Kobayashi vs. Chestnut, to name a few. Clearly the judges have their hands full picking a winner in this one. I have to give credit where credit is due.......obviously the FOX Sports girls came to play. And in my dreams, I can only hope they will play not-so-nicely with the lovely gals over at ESPN. So, in order I'm taking Jillian, Lindsay, Colleen, Charissa, and both Erin and Lisa. FOX gets the nod by a 4 to 2 count. Note to ESPN: FOX has served notice and you are now officially on the clock.